10 Tips for a Stress-free Wedding

Your engagement is a special period. You go a step further in your relationship and that is not anything. But after the first moments of happiness in announcing your surroundings, a lot comes to you during wedding planning. That’s why tips to make your wedding planning experience as fun, stress-free, positive, and loving as possible.

Be a team from the start

In many couples, one of the two is always slightly more interested or enthusiastic about planning the wedding than the other. It can be tempting to let that person do her / his thing. But when you’re not on the same page and working together, it can lead to irritation and even arguments over time when it comes to decision-making, budget management, dealing with suppliers and pressing questions from friends and family. And let’s be honest you are getting married TOGETHER.

Before making decisions, sit down together for the wedding planning to discuss in an honest conversation how you envision your wedding, who you want to invite and how much you can realistically spend, and whether you want to invest in a wedding planner or stylist. Communication is the best tool for avoiding disagreements and stress in what should be a pleasant and fun time. Listen to the other.

Make a realistic budget

Most couples make a wedding budget or at least a list of what they want to spend on certain areas of their wedding. Only a few couples make a well-composed budget based on actual costs. So once they start looking for suppliers, they find out that they are well over budget without knowing why.

On various wedding blogs, you can get an indication about which category/service should cost approximately. Keep in mind that everyone celebrates a wedding differently. One person spends a few thousand euros (very low budget with the help of friends and without professional suppliers) to the other, a high-end wedding with a celebrity as a singer.

Add at least 10% to everything, because you will find that you often want more and more nice ideas and extras (it is all so much fun) than you initially thought. Not only are there many more options than you thought. A whole world will open up for you if you delve into just a location, dress, band, and a wedding bouquet.

Put expectations with others
Friends and family can let themselves go in your wedding out of sheer enthusiasm. They come up within their eyes – fantastic ideas. Which is great, but sometimes it can be very overwhelming. And not always in line with what you yourself had in mind. Sometimes you feel almost obligated to take the advice and you don’t want to step on anyone’s toes. But you only get married once. In order not to regret later, it is important to stay with your feelings and not to let people around you lead too much. If you want to go for an intimate, informal, non-religious, or non-traditional wedding, it is good to prepare parents and older family members for this as early as possible.

Controlling expectations will help you avoid stress, confusion, and hurt feelings on the way to your big day.

4 Also set your own realistic expectations

So many of you may have dreamed of the big white dress, beautiful castle, 10 tier wedding cake and all your friends and family. And now you will find out how much that costs. Yikes! There’s no reason you can’t have all of that (there are ways to make things work on any budget!). But being practical and keeping perspective is perhaps the most important thing you can do to avoid anxiety while planning.

Don’t pressure yourself to have the “perfect” wedding. It doesn’t exist and it will only ruin your big day if you look for anything that’s not right.

Also, manage your expectations about yourself. You don’t have to be Uber slim to enjoy your day. A smaller size dress is really not going to make you shine anymore. You already do. Find a nice dress in your size, whatever it is. Don’t stress for a year to get to that “ideal” weight. It’s good to have a goal, but extreme and obsessive weight loss doesn’t help anyone.

Make choices

Almost always, when bridal couples ask for advice on wedding planning, I say, “Pick three things that are really your priorities, and focus your budget on that.”

The problem is, for most people, the priorities are often food, photography, music, or the location. These are all the most expensive, the biggest parts of wedding planning. To avoid getting stressed (and going over your budget), I think you should choose a maximum of two priorities, for example, food and photography, or decoration and entertainment. You can still find a good venue, caterer or band if you don’t select them as your priorities, but don’t let it stress you if you guys can’t get your number one choice on everything. You really won’t remember your compromises on the day, if you’ve thought about what’s really important to you in advance. I promise!

Learn how to say no
Some couples deal with family and friends with lots of advice and suggestions. Learn to take kind advice and listen to people’s views. But at the end of the day, it’s your wedding. So if your mom wants to invite her second cousin, your dad who thinks you want to be picked up in a white limousine when you actually want a laid back wedding without glam, and your sister insists you throw a bouquet when you don’t want to just say ‘no’.

You’re bound to make concessions here and there (like I said, it’s all about diplomacy!). But if you tell yourself ‘yes’ to too many things, you lose control of the day. Then you’ll have to find a way to tell them very gently, but firmly, that it’s not part of your plan.

Make a non-wedding plan

This may go without saying for some, but don’t put your normal life on hold while planning your wedding. While saving and planning the wedding, all the attention goes to the wedding, leaving couples feeling a huge emptiness after the wedding.

Do plenty of non-wedding-related things during your engagement as well; meet up with friends and don’t talk about your wedding, and plan weekends away. Just old-fashioned romance to keep an eye out for each other in all the hustle and bustle and exciting times.

If you feel like a whole year of your life is going into organizing your wedding, you’re more likely to get anxious about how it all turns out. Your wedding deserves a lot of time and attention, but it doesn’t have to be the only thing on your mind.

8 Set moments for your wedding planning

Otherwise, make time for wedding planning. For example, choose standard days; Monday evening and Saturday morning.

When you set aside time in your week to make decisions, you will both feel that you are making progress. But also that wedding planning does not take over other aspects of your life. Especially your social life!

9 Make a schedule

Check off what you have done. This forces you to make choices. By the way, make sure you have everything ready at least 2 weeks before the wedding. You don’t want to be busy with the to-do’s in the last few weeks but enjoy this special step.

10 Call in an expert

Do you still feel overwhelmed despite these tips? Not sure whether you are making the right choices? Can’t see the wood for the trees? A wedding planner can help you with advice and as a sparring partner. She takes over the wedding planning with all the – oh so boring – logistical hassle and endless communication with suppliers, while you taste the fun things such as wedding cake, wedding dress fit, etc. A wedding stylist can also help you to really give a special touch to the day. With all the knowledge and awesome items they can provide, every wedding location is transformed into a special one where the guests will drop a lot of o oohs and aahs. Don’t worry! It remains your wedding and you still have input. It just gets a bit nicer! Take a look at the services to see what NINA weddings can do for you. This way you can fully enjoy the run-up to the wedding and the day itself.

Felix Tammi

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